I do wish sometimes he could tell me something that gives me a little glimmer of hope.
You know,sigh.
Had tuition today and he lost his patience. Not that he blew up,but I could sense a very huge disappointment in his tone. You know,breathing out very slowly and slowly softly,slowy.... You just know it. Well,some times he seriously makes me feel like I'm stupid. But whatever. Being smarter academically is for my own benefit too and damn,I do wish that I'm smarter.
Some times.. I just feel that I'm very turned off by him. He's got a bit of ego in him. Yeah,I know he's charismatic,but humility please. Otherwise it's just such a turn off. But then again,isn't me being turned off a good thing? I mean,then I can move on from here. And his mind is just so,just way too complex for me to understand. I have a very simple and naive mind,you know. I cannot comprehend what goes beyond that,nor understand complexity.
He often questions what is happiness. Which got me thinking too,what is happiness? Am I happy? I would say yes. But why? Well,let's just say that I'm not unhappy about anything,or depressed. I'm happy with my life,the way it is. The friends around me,things that keep me entertained and perhaps even by listening to music. So may I ask,why does he seemed so unhappy? Like,unhappy about life,feeling so frustrated and agonising himselfe mentally? What a weird thing to do. Can't he just think simpler? Strange I suppose,but perhaps that's just him. Whatever. -shrugs-
I just kinda not wanna see him sad or agonize himself this way,you see. I'll be upset too to see him unhappy... Sigh. :(
Just,in any case,I just really really. Wish with all my heart,that he'd one day be..
Mine.
Not mine,but be with me.
You know,sigh.
Had tuition today and he lost his patience. Not that he blew up,but I could sense a very huge disappointment in his tone. You know,breathing out very slowly and slowly softly,slowy.... You just know it. Well,some times he seriously makes me feel like I'm stupid. But whatever. Being smarter academically is for my own benefit too and damn,I do wish that I'm smarter.
Some times.. I just feel that I'm very turned off by him. He's got a bit of ego in him. Yeah,I know he's charismatic,but humility please. Otherwise it's just such a turn off. But then again,isn't me being turned off a good thing? I mean,then I can move on from here. And his mind is just so,just way too complex for me to understand. I have a very simple and naive mind,you know. I cannot comprehend what goes beyond that,nor understand complexity.
He often questions what is happiness. Which got me thinking too,what is happiness? Am I happy? I would say yes. But why? Well,let's just say that I'm not unhappy about anything,or depressed. I'm happy with my life,the way it is. The friends around me,things that keep me entertained and perhaps even by listening to music. So may I ask,why does he seemed so unhappy? Like,unhappy about life,feeling so frustrated and agonising himselfe mentally? What a weird thing to do. Can't he just think simpler? Strange I suppose,but perhaps that's just him. Whatever. -shrugs-
I just kinda not wanna see him sad or agonize himself this way,you see. I'll be upset too to see him unhappy... Sigh. :(
Just,in any case,I just really really. Wish with all my heart,that he'd one day be..
Mine.
Not mine,but be with me.
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